Sometime in the beginning of this past summer, Jenn and I had the idea to send some Amish cigars around and conduct a taste test. We did this for fun, and out of our own pocket, neither of us have any financial interest in the cigars tasted, except to see what folks thought of them. We selected a panel of tasters from ASC, and some intrepid herfers at the Pismo herf Day (PhD) in California even purchased their own samples and submitted reviews. The tasting survey was loosley adapted from the MOTT at CigarNexus, so apologies are in order to Sr. Saka and the crew there. :-)
Each taster was asked to complete an online survey, ranking each cigar's apearance, construction, aroma, burn, draw, strength, ash, and overall impression. Each taster was also asked to comment on each (which is truly where the entertainment was in this project). The comments are reprinted here verbatim.
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Cigar #1 Amish Palma Length: 6 1/2 inch Ring Gauge: 43 Wrapper: Homogenized Binder: Homogenized Filler: Imported & Domestic Shape: Palma |
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Apearance = Excellent Above Average Average Below Average Poor Douglas Manz xx Chris Buck xx Lorraine Tenison xx Bob Ray xx David Farmer xx Danny Johnson xx Les Armstrong xx Lee Watters xx Christian Eiroa xx Comments:
Doug said: Well, it looked as best as brown paper can be expected to look. There wasn't really a band, except the one that was an itegral part of the cello. Once the cello was removed, the reconstituted leaf/paper and pre-formed draw hole (known hallmarks of quality) could be truly appreciated. (gack!)Chris said: Nice homogenized wrapper!
Lorraine said: Very nice looking cigar.
Bob Said: Now I've seen everything. First, Amish spam--now an apparently machine-made Amish cigar.This baby looks more like a Swisher than the average Swisher does.They do seem to have good quality control in the dyeing room, however, as the color was quite uniform.
David said: Good non-leaf wrapper. Looks like it may be processed tobacco leaf.
Danny said: very smooth machined cigar light brown paper wrapper
Lee said: might be just a little too perfect looking - thank God it's pre-punched for my convenience.
Construction = Built Like a Spare Buggy Average Retains Shape Poor Brick Wheel Spoke Outhouse Douglas Manz xx Chris Buck xx Lorraine Tenison xx Bob Ray xx David Farmer xx Danny Johnson xx Les Armstrong xx Lee Watters xx Christian Eiroa xx Doug said: Firm at the head, soft at the foot. You'd think a machine could make a better cigar.Chris Said: Before smoking, I used it to prop open the window with the broken sash.
Lorraine said: Held it's shape all the way through.
Bob said: This cigar was quite cylindrical, as we've come to expect from the machined guys. I also thought that the substantial non-tobacco material was quite well integrated into the mixed filler inside the cigar.The machine could have used a little adjustment, however, as the cigar was somewhat tight. This almost never happens with Swishers.
David said: Got soft near end of smoke (band and past)
Danny said: Machine made 5.75x45 natural smoke. Pin hole in the head. Natural color. medium filler.
Lee said: Nicely packed, not unlike Kelly McGillis in "Witness"
Aroma = Wonderful Acceptable Stinky Smelled like Road Apples Smelled Like burnt road Apples Douglas Manz xx Chris Buck xx Lorraine Tenison xx Bob Ray xx David Farmer xx Danny Johnson xx Les Armstrong xx Lee Watters xx Christian Eiroa xx Doug said: Not offensive. This is the only note of optimism so far.Lorraine said: I couldn't really smell it much. Really mild smelling.
Bob said My wife flinched at the pre-light aroma and retreated to the bedroom once the cigar got going. Her parting words were, "Be sure to take a shower before you come to bed."
David said: I liked the smell. Women in bonnets started following me around adoringly.
Danny said: sweet very mild aroma
Lee said: in a "damn, Josiah, when was the last time you cleaned the barn" or a "Okay, Heimlich, who cuttethed the curds" kind of way
Burn = Very Even Even Uneven Crooked As A Country Road Smoked Half, The Left Half Douglas Manz xx Chris Buck xx Lorraine Tenison xx Bob Ray xx David Farmer xx Danny Johnson xx Les Armstrong xx Lee Watters xx Christian Eiroa xx Doug said:just not fast enough...Lorraine said: Very nice burn.
Bob said: This thing burned pretty straight although I often wished that it would go out.
David said: No problem.
Danny said: paper wrapper kept burn even.
Lee said: Started to stray from the proper way, but came back into the fold.
Draw = Too Easy Easy Perfect Tight Tighter Than Hell Douglas Manz xx Chris Buck xx Lorraine Tenison xx Bob Ray xx David Farmer xx Danny Johnson xx Les Armstrong xx Lee Watters xx Christian Eiroa xx Lorraine said: Didn't haven't to suck like a vacuum or like I was sucking through a straw. Perfect.Bob said: Not the kind that makes your veins bulge, but a little too tight for comfort.
David said: The already-made cut was very convenient.
Danny said: Did not cut this one. pin hole was sufficient. plenty of smoke
Lee said: I've spent a lot more for cigars that didn't draw this well.
Strength = Strong as a Team of Mules Medium Mild Non-Existant Douglas Manz xx Chris Buck xx Lorraine Tenison xx Bob Ray xx David Farmer xx Danny Johnson xx Les Armstrong xx Lee Watters xx Christian Eiroa xx Doug said: Went form "is this thing lit"? to "Yuk! Put this thing out"!Lorraine said: Not too mild or too strong. A mild/medium strength.
Bob said: More nasty than strong. I think the paper in it needed a little more aging.
David said: Decent for a machine-made.
Danny said: this was very mild but pleasant for the very occasional smoke. Sweet flavor to the lips and tongue similar to a swisher.
Lee said: Mild as an Amish baby sleeping in her mother's arms.
Ash = Firm Flakey Really Messy Dropped All Over Quilt Best Part Of Cigar Douglas Manz xx Chris Buck xx Lorraine Tenison xx Bob Ray xx David Farmer xx Danny Johnson xx Les Armstrong xx Lee Watters xx Christian Eiroa xx Lorraine said: Kind of flaky. Had to watch out not to drop any on me or my dogs.Bob said: Not a bad ash.
David said: Very little flaking. I could have been making chairs without also making a mess.
Danny said: ash was white and even in color and burn due to paper wrap
Lee said: White as Kelly McGillis' cleavage.
Overall Impression = New Everyday Accept For Wouldn't Bother Wish I Hadn't If I ever see the Cigar Free With Again Volunteered Vanderslices... Douglas Manz xx Chris Buck xx Lorraine Tenison xx Bob Ray xx David Farmer xx Danny Johnson xx Les Armstrong xx Lee Watters xx Christian Eiroa xx Doug said: Yuck! Blech! Ptooey! I understand that the Vanderslices are very nice people, even if they did try to poison us :)Chris said: This would make me put aside my El Producto Queens! Lots of flavor with a long papery finish!
Lorraine said: Very nice cigar. Had a slight sweet taste at first. Would like to smoke again. Cute label. I liked it.
Bob said: knew I was in trouble when I found that the only way to get the cello off was to pull the band--the cigar equivalent to unscrewing the cap on a wine bottle. I honestly don't think you could tell this thing from a Swisher in a blind taste test. The Swisher was actually a Swisher Slim with a band on it. It even has the patented Swisher propylene Glycol taste around the cap.
David said: I liked the amount of sweetness. I think it made the cigar eminently smokable. Just don't drink a Diet Coke with it.
Danny said: This was a very mild but pleasant (no offensive traits). This cigar is ok for style and construction.
Les said: A nice little smoke. Not too harsh with good flavor
Lee said: I've had worse. Much worse. In a pinch, this would do better than anything in a drugstore. Liked the sweet cap.
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Cigar #2 Amish Pa. #1 Length: 6 inch Ring Gauge: 45 Wrapper: Penna. Binder: Penna. Filler: PA Blend Shape: Corona |
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Apearance = Excellent Above Average Average Below Average Poor Douglas Manz xx Chris Buck ** Lorraine Tenison xx Bob Ray ** David Farmer xx Danny Johnson xx Les Armstrong xx Lee Watters xx Christian Eiroa ** Jamie Foster xx Rick Baker xx Comments:
Doug said: But at least it was a leaf. Ahh, the preformed draw hole that says "sure this is going to suck, but at least you don't have to work hard to find that out for sure".Lorraine said: Not too bad looking. A little rough around the edges but still "pretty".
Bob Said: At first, I thought it may have been rolled in the winter by an Amish torcedor with mittens on. After smoking it, however, I realized that the roller was actually quite skilled to construct a cigar that burned this well using army-surplus wrapper
David said: Real leaf, but very veiny. Definitely not something you want to pass out after the barn raising.
Danny said: Gold and brown brindle color. Rustic looking wrapper with large veins.
Lee said: It's ugly, but in a pleasant Henry Clay kind of way
Jamie said: Pretty rugged.
Rick said: kinda looked like a cigar
Construction = Built Like a Spare Buggy Average Retains Shape Poor Brick Wheel Spoke Outhouse Douglas Manz xx Chris Buck ** Lorraine Tenison xx Bob Ray ** David Farmer xx Danny Johnson xx Les Armstrong xx Lee Watters xx Christian Eiroa Jamie Foster xx Rick Baker xx Doug said: OK, it was firm. So is an old dog rocket.Lorraine said: No peeling or cracking.
Bob said: The wrapper changed color more often than Newt Gingrich at a gay-pride rally and had worse veins than Keith Richard. It also had puckers, ridges, and a small image of the Virgin Mary(if you looked really close).
David said: This was one packed smoke. It would made a good dowel once you sanded down the veins.
Danny said: hand rolled with frumpy consistancy.the head has a pre-punched pin hole. Later cut to allow adequate draw. Long Filler. aprox. 6x46
Les said: Wrapper was a bit loose
Lee said: I'm just not sure yet what that shape is.
Rick said: kinda looked like a cigar ** Please note that there was an error originally on the survey form that omitted the first 2 categories. Several of the earlier responses are missing for this reason. My apologies - CV
Aroma = Wonderful Acceptable Stinky Smelled like Road Apples Smelled Like burnt road Apples Douglas Manz xx Chris Buck xx Lorraine Tenison xx Bob Ray xx David Farmer xx Danny Johnson xx Les Armstrong xx Lee Watters xx Christian Eiroa xx Jamie Foster xx Rick Baker xx Doug said: Tearing open the cello was like opening a cript. Whew!Chris said: If you like the bouquet of an Aborigines' armpit!
Lorraine said: Stronger smelling than the Banded cigar. More stogieish.
Bob said I smoked this one just after the banded one so it was hard to get a good line on the aroma. Pre-light aroma was missing but I think the post-light aroma was acceptable
David said: Bonneted chicks disappeared quickly.
Danny said: The sweet mild aroma was a nice start and continued through 3/4 of cigar.
Lee said: Smells like... smells like... smells like... hmmm. Kelly McGillis' feet, maybe? Not that I've smelled them. Maybe Harrison Ford's feet - not that I've smelled those either.
Jamie said: Smelled much like cigarette tabacco (unlit) - pleasant.
Rick said: smelled like a cigerette
Burn = Very Even Even Uneven Crooked As A Country Road Smoked Half, The Left Half Douglas Manz xx Chris Buck xx Lorraine Tenison xx Bob Ray xx David Farmer xx Danny Johnson xx Les Armstrong xx Lee Watters xx Christian Eiroa xx Jamie Foster xx Rick Baker xx Doug said: Had a runner, not the worst of it's problems.Chris said: I think the ash even hated this cigar so much, it didn't know where to burn first.
Lorraine said: It was a little uneven at first but straightened out around 1/2 way through.
Bob said: Burned evenly for such an ugly cigar.
David said: No important problems.
Danny said: large veins and wet condition led to uneven burn and ugly ash. early build up of tar.
Rick said: kinda burned like a cigar
Draw = Too Easy Easy Perfect Tight Tighter Than Hell Douglas Manz xx Chris Buck xx Lorraine Tenison xx Bob Ray xx David Farmer xx Danny Johnson xx Les Armstrong xx Lee Watters xx Christian Eiroa xx Jamie Foster xx Rick Baker xx Cris said: To bad. I was hoping the draw would give me an excuse to throw it away.Lorraine said: Nice even sucking action. Didn't get sore cheeks sucking too hard.
Bob said: Nice draw for such an ugly cigar
David said: The convenient hole was too small. I would have preferred a bigger hole chancing bits getting into my mouth. Most men would never admit this.
Danny said: Draw was a little tight but improve with a good snip of about 1/4". Plenty of smoke at 50%
Lee said: Like trying to suck the milk out of the wrong end of a cow... not that I've ever tried it, but I read a lot.
Rick said: kinda hard to draw with it - kept burning the drawing pad
Strength = Strong as a Team of Mules Medium Mild Non-Existant Douglas Manz xx Chris Buck xx Lorraine Tenison xx Bob Ray xx David Farmer xx Danny Johnson xx Les Armstrong xx Lee Watters xx Christian Eiroa xx Jamie Foster xx Rick Baker xx Doug said: Flavor went from zero to some kind of tar with a sickly sweet finish. Sort of like a pine bark and spoiled honey sandwich.Chris said: hit the back of the throat like a shot of Drano.
Lorraine said: Stronger than most I smoke. Had to drink a lot of water to cool my throat. Slight head rush.
Bob said: Mild to medium.
David said: I got an acid stomach.
Danny said: The flavor seemed a mild but astringent. little body, earth notes. Tin metallic flavor increased at 50%. I felt a nicotine buzz very early.
Lee said: Wouldn't raise a barn, but there was some strength there.
Rick said: L.A. air is stronger
Ash = Firm Flakey Really Messy Dropped All Over Best Part Of Cigar My Quilt Douglas Manz xx Chris Buck xx Lorraine Tenison xx Bob Ray xx David Farmer xx Danny Johnson xx Les Armstrong xx Lee Watters xx Christian Eiroa xx Jamie Foster xx Rick Baker xx Lorraine said: A little flaky at first but got firmer after a few puffs.Bob said: Not bad at all.
David said: The only problem here was that the burned veins often refused to leave with the rest of the ash. This often looked vulgar and I don't believe I would smoke this around the womenfolk unless it was my wedding night.
Danny said: gray to dark Grey. Very ragged ash and inconsistent burn.
Lee said: I'd have to have Ma sweep out the buggy after this one.
Rick said: used it to polish my silver!
Overall Impression = New Everyday Would Accept Wouldn't Bother Wish I Hadn't If I ever see the Cigar For Free With Again Volunteered Vanderslices... Douglas Manz xx Chris Buck xx Lorraine Tenison xx Bob Ray xx David Farmer xx Danny Johnson xx Les Armstrong xx Lee Watters xx Christian Eiroa xx Jamie Foster xx Rick Baker xx Doug said: Ew. Why are they doing this to me?Chris said: Did you pay extra for the veins in the wrapper, or did they throw these in for free?
Lorraine said: Not a bad cigar. It got reddish ooze coming out the end at about 3/4 through smoking. What is up with that? I think a little aging would do it justice. The UNBANDED cigar was bitter at first and about a 1/2 hour after smoking it, it gave me a headache. I did the survey right after smoking it. It seemed to irritate my throat some, also.
Bob said: In spite of its hideous appearance, this cigar was not all that bad when compared to the banded one. Summing up my impression of this cigar, I would say that it was just slightly better than no cigar at all and WAY better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick. I forgot to mention in my review of the Amish cigars that it took 14 Chips Ahoy cookies dunked in milk to recover from smoking them.
David said: Maybe it would have been better had it passed through my horse's digestive system first. But then I wouldn't have been able to have it pull the buggy for a day or two. Ayup.
Danny said: Young or wet cigar wins no beauty awards with the aroma being it's best attribute.Started very mild and innocent but ended limp and soggy. At 30% I took one last draw and got "lock-jaw" . The aroma is deceiving.
Lee said: This thing was harsh as God's wrath for missing a barn raising. Good thing the Vanderslices have kids... and Jenn has that bustier
... Jamie said: If anyone's aching to try one, let me know - I've got a few left over...
Rick said: not as bad as my last prostate exam but close
